You Decide

"The Soulmate Secret - Interview with Arielle Ford

By Arielle Ford    February 11th, 2009 
Source Dream Manifesto

" 1. What is the Law of Attraction? Why does a person who is looking for their soulmate need to understand how this law works as they go about searching for that one special person?

The Law of Attraction is a universal principle which states that we draw to us people, events and circumstances in the outer world that match our inner state of being.  It's important to understand this law because if we approach the process of finding a soulmate with a feeling of resignation or desperation, we unwittingly send out a signal that repels the very thing we are seeking.  The Soulmate Secret provides a proven formula to ready ourselves on all levels - physically, emotionally, and spiritually - to attract the man or woman of our dreams.

2. You write, "This wonderful universe of ours is set up to deliver to us the people and experiences that are consistent with our personal belief systems." Can you explain this? What if our belief system comes from hurtful experiences or perhaps a childhood that told us we deserve nothing, we are worthless, and we should be ashamed of ourselves?

Well, I think you've just described 99% of the population!  The fact is, most of us operate from limiting beliefs we picked up unconsciously in childhood... and nowhere do these beliefs become more apparent than in our intimate relationships.  In the book, I show people how to begin to dismantle their negative beliefs about themselves and about relationships and replace them with beliefs that affirm their inherent lovability.  As we make this shift, our new beliefs act like a magnet that pulls in greater love and appreciation into our lives.

3. Can you share with us your own experience in finding your soulmate?  How did you prepare yourself to meet your soulmate and what did you learn about attracting great love along the way?

The period of time right before I met Brian was incredibly productive and fertile.  I had spent the previous year practicing all the techniques I share in the book: I clarified exactly what I wanted in a husband, I made my Soulmate List and released it to the Universe, and I made space in my home and in my heart for another person. As I fell more in love with myself and my life, I attracted love from every possible source: friendships were deeper and more fulfilling, business opportunities came with greater ease, and I experienced more success on every level.  The way Brian and I actually met was so magical that it could never have been planned - I tell the whole story in the book.  It's worth the read because it highlights how many clues the Universe gave me along the way ... clues that I could have easily missed if I hadn't done all the work to prepare myself ahead of time.

4. How did learning on Oprah that Barbra Streisand had found her soulmate solidify your belief that your soulmate was somewhere out there?

I happened to be watching the show one day just after Barbra Streisand and James Brolin had just fallen in love.  I remember thinking, Here is this super-wealthy, ultra famous diva who is "reputedly difficult" and practically inaccessible.  How many men could be a match for her?  Then I realized, If the Universe could find somebody for her, then I'll be a piece of cake!  That moment was truly a state of grace.  It reminded me of something my grandmother had always told me:  "There's a lid for every pot."  Somehow, seeing that even Barbra Streisand's pot came with a good fitting lid strengthened my belief.

5. What can block a person from finding their soulmate? How can one remove these blocks from their life?

There are a lot of things that people do to unconsciously block love.  In my own case, I realized that there were several issues that were preventing me from manifesting the love I desired.  First, I didn't believe I deserved a great relationship; second, I didn't love myself; and third, I had a lot of emotional baggage.  I began using everything I had ever learned about manifestation, psychology, spirituality, and the Law of Attraction and applied it to my love life.  Whatever blocks you may have to receiving love - whether it be physical, emotional or energetic - The Soumate Secret formula will help you to dissolve it.

6. You wrote, "Finding true love is possible for anyone at any age if you're willing to prepare yourself, on all levels, to become an energetic match for the love you're seeking." Do you really believe any woman, at any age, can find true love if she truly applies the principles in this book? How can a person prepare themselves to be an energetic match for the love they are seeking?

I absolutely believe that finding true love is possible for all of us - regardless of our body type, our past history, or our financial status.  I also believe that to find our match, we have to be willing to work on ourselves - to unhook from the past, to clear the clutter from our hearts and our home, and to invest the time in discovering the qualities that are really important to us.  This book offers practical techniques, rituals and processes that readers can begin doing right now to ready themselves for BIG LOVE.

7. What words of advice do you have for a woman who is in her 40s or 50s, and has gone through a lot of hurt and disappointments in her life, who feels that it isn't in the cards for her to have true love?

Healing your heart from wounds of the past is an essential step toward manifesting your soulmate.  You have to be gentle with yourself and take all the time you need to recover from a bad breakup. Once you're ready to move on, you can use the emotional release techniques outlined in The Soulmate Secret to forgive yourself AND the other person.  When you are no longer harboring resentments or disappointments from the past, you send out a signal of readiness and clear the way for love to find you.

8. What is a 'feelingization"? How does it differ from a visualization, and how can it be used to manifest a soulmate?

Feelingizations are processes to put you into the "feeling" state of already being, doing or having whatever it is that you want to manifest.  If you want more love, you first need to evoke from within you the experience of love.  It is from that feeling space that you manifest more love into your life.

9. How can a person get themselves to actually believe there is plenty of love in the world, and that they are worthy of love, if perhaps they've lived a long time without love or they have gone through many painful rejections?

Belief is an important first step on the journey of meeting your soulmate.  As we release some of the disappointments and heartaches from the past, it becomes easier to nurture the belief that we deserve to be cherished, seen, and adored.  In the same way we trust that there is enough air for us to breathe and enough water for us to drink, we can learn to trust that there is enough love in the world for everyone. As we make this shift in our core belief system, we begin to accumulate evidence that supports it.

10. What are some affirmations and rituals a person can do to make themselves into a magnet for love and bring their soulmate to them?

I share dozens of them in the book, but one of my favorite exercises to practice beaming love at everyone I meet.  I like to imagine that within the space of my heart there is a light - like a torch or a flame or a GPS switch - that grows brighter as I place my attention on it.  Place your awareness around the area of your heart and imagining this light growing brighter and brighter, broadcasting your lovability to every man, woman, child, and sentient being on the planet.   This is a fun practice, not only because it feels great and makes us incredibly attractive, but because somewhere deep within his or her being, your beloved can feel the energy you are sending out and this, I believe, draws him or her to you at some primordial level.

11. What if a person is still carrying some great hurt from a broken marriage or relationship, how can they let this pain go so that they are able and ready to welcome a soulmate?

We first have to fall in love with ourselves before we open the door to receiving love from anyone else.  There are plenty of great processes out there, including therapy and personal growth workshops that support people in overcoming the pain of the past so they can let new love in.  Anything we do to find more love, compassion, and excitement about ourselves is well worth the time and energy.

12. How can one prepare their home for their future soulmate? Why is this type of physical preparation important?

Well, imagine for just a moment that you were planning to move to a new city.  Think of all the planning, preparation and research you would likely invest in the move.  Making space in your life for your soulmate requires at least as much preparation as moving to a new city.  By taking the time to transform your home into a haven where you feel cozy and sensual, you are rolling out a cosmic welcome mat that sends out an undeniable signal that you are ready for him or her to enter your life.  When I was preparing to meet Brian, I enlisted the help of several Feng Shui experts, all of whom taught me a great deal about rearranging my space so it was a conduit for attracting love.  The very best of their advice is outlined in the book.

13. How can a person change from feeling desperate and hopeless about meeting their soulmate, to living as if their soulmate is about to arrive with certainty and conviction? Can you explain the principle of 'living as if'?

"Living as if" basically means deciding not to postpone your happiness until after your soulmate arrives.  Whatever you dream that you'll be, do, have, or feel once you meet the love of your life, begin being and doing that now.  It's easy to fantasize about how great we'll feel, how good we'll look, and what excellent choices we'll make once we have someone to share our lives with. But this approach is all backward!  By looking for things to appreciate about ourselves and our lives right now, we generate the feeling state that we are loved and adored.  This is the perfect state of being for love to find us.

14. What are your best five tips for those who have prepared themselves emotionally, spiritually and physically for their soulmate and are now ready to take action? What actions are appropriate for someone to take to find his or her soulmate?

Jack Canfield, who wrote the afterword for The Soulmate Secret, points out that there are really two types of action.  The first he calls "obvious actions," which operate under the common sense principle that in order to succeed in any area of life, we first have to put ourselves onto the playing field.  Obvious actions for finding your soulmate include joining an online dating network and regularly putting yourself in the types of environments where you are likely to meet people with similar interests.  The second type of action is what Jack calls "inspired actions."  These are impulses that arise within you that don't appear to logically or directly correlate with the goal of falling in love - yet they are as important to follow through with as obvious actions.  There are countless stories in the book about people who followed an intuitive hunch to go to a certain event, or went on a blind date because they had a gut feeling that they should - and ended up meeting the love of their life.  It's the combination of the two - obvious actions and inspired actions - that will win you the big prize!

15. This is truly a beautiful book on finding one's soulmate. What did you enjoy most about writing this book?

I loved hearing from people who used these manifestation techniques to attract BIG LOVE into their lives.  I also loved the ease with which the message seemed to flow through me.  The whole premise of the book is that by preparing ourselves inside to receive love, our inevitable rendezvous with our soulmate is spontaneous and effortless.  Spontaneous and effortless also describes the writing of this book.  It feels like a message I was meant to share. .........."

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